Taking Stock

Too many people live their lives thinking of the years to come and miss out on the joy of being alive today.

I have friends who died fairly young, missing the chance of seeing their children grow up, get married and enjoy their grandchildren.

This saddens me, as some of these friends allowed themselves to spoil their days by worrying about things that didn’t really matter. Brainwashed by this new society of ours, where they are made to feel that outside beauty is more important than the beauty that lies within, they wasted their precious living time thinking how they looked, when there are so many more interesting things to fill one’s mind with. Being aware that being alive is important should have been uppermost in their thoughts.

If they could have realized and been happy in the knowledge that being alive and well was the most important thing in life, then they would have got their priorities right and would have enjoyed life as it is meant to be enjoyed.

However, not many of us are able to see life this way until something happens - and then, sadly, it is often too late.

I have a dear friend who died at age sixty-six, and when he knew he had only a short time to live he told his wife he wished he had not been so frugal. He left behind a rich, sad wife who could have enjoyed a better life with the man she loved.

There are very often actions we would like to follow but we are prevented from doing so as we consider what is right and what is wrong, and if our actions will cause suffering to others. In all matters, most of us will be guided by our consciences and will be obliged to consider others and the responsibilities we have taken upon our shoulders, such as husbands, wives, children and parents.

Always busy, I suppose it is understandable that we very rarely have time to give much of our daily thoughts to how lucky we are to be alive. Taking each day for granted is mostly for the young. It is only when you are older and there is not so much life left that you are able to cherish what you have.

Life is like a sauce, it starts out with a lot in the pan, tastes good but not as good as when the sauce reduces, and the little that is left tastes even better.

To be able to enjoy life, it should be recognized and be seen as a gamble. There are no guarantees - no insurance policy was handed out when the umbilical cord was cut.

Life is for living, and if you are one of the lucky ones to be alive, don’t waste it!

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For myself, I am not the sort of person who believes in saving the best for later. I use my best glasses every day. I wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it. I have been known to paint in a new dress, because the mood took me. It shocked my brother when he found me doing this. The dress was thrown away years ago and with or without it, my life went on just the same.

Maybe my action would be correctly called irresponsible but it was no great catastrophe. However, my brother saw it as such., and has never forgotten it. You can tell we are different people because of the way we regard that situation. He could never take a chance the way I do and I could never look at life the way he does. We are not all alike. He has stayed in the same house for twenty-five years, readying it for his retirement. I have moved seven times in the same number of years and have also moved to a different country to live.

I don't save an expensive perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to.

The words someday and one day have never been a part of my life. If it's worth seeing, listening to or doing, I want to see, listen and do it now, while I am able to. I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter, joy and happiness into my life or to those I love. I eat oysters when I know they are too expensive and I should think of the cost. But I have always said, "I enjoy them now. Who knows if I will be around to enjoy them tomorrow?"

I phone my friends to I let them know I think of them. They may live overseas and the call is costly but I do not wait till it is too late, and then say, "I wish I had." It is important that they know I care about them now. I buy flowers for people I like, to enjoy now. I do not send flowers when the person is no longer alive and cannot see them and enjoy their perfume.

Friends have told me for years that I must watch how I spend as one day I will be sorry for not thinking of rainy days. Well, I have friends who have saved for a rainy day and even though it was pouring buckets, they still did not spend. Family and friends were telling me twenty-five years ago, "Don't be so generous, don’t be so extravagant," but I have lived the way I enjoy living and I have traveled, enjoyed lovely homes, entertained as I wanted, worn nice clothes and have done more than most people I know.

Living the way I do may not be possible for some, as you have to be confident and positive. You have to make things happen. Staying at home doing nothing will never bring rewards, and if you choose the wrong path, then don't blame someone else for it.

I do! That’s when I blame 'My Angel'. I have always known I have an angel looking after me and I suppose this has given me the confidence to take chances and still feel safe.

I tell my friends and family not to worry about me, as I have never seen an old person lying in the street dying of hunger here, so I guess I will survive.

Now retired and living with less money becomes a new sort of challenge. If I were rich and could do all the things I want to without having to save, if I could pay my bills without having to worry, there would be no challenges and what would life be like with nothing left to challenge me? It is facing the challenges and succeeding that makes one feel alive.

There are so many old people who are very well off financially and never seem to enjoy their lives. They never give when they could have the pleasure of seeing their recipients enjoy their gifts now, but leave their money to family and friends to enjoy when they are no longer here. It is all so strange to me. I love to give, but I also love to see the pleasure my gift brings.

It is a fact that as one grows older one's desires and needs become less. Some people suddenly suffer an illness and are prevented from doing all those things they saved for and planned to do later. It happens so many times and one thinks, what a waste.

Then it is too late for them to say, "I wish I had done it when I was able to."

- Lorraine Roxon Harrington 
Oxenford, Queensland, Australia.